I Need Someone to Protect Me from Myself

Without law and order, man has no freedom.  This statement represents a classic paradox.  Within all societies exists a code of ethics governing both professional and social situations.  Suppose, for a moment, that our government made all our decisions.  Big brother declares our actions, taking away our ability to choose.   For your next blog, think about what freedom really means.  Perhaps you may want to even check the US Constitution for some inspiration before answering this prompt.  Once you have thought deeply about true meaning of freedom, make a case for or against total government control.  You may even cite certain historical events in our own country or abroad. For example, the parental advisory stickers on music CDs started with the notion that the government decides what content can be heard.  Presently, there are countries that limit these freedoms we often take for granted.  However, some believe that these liberties lead to a decadent society.  Make your choice and argue your position.  This prompt will be worth two blogs.

Trouble with Routers

Blog IV and V

Trouble with Routers

Operator:  Hullo, and thank you for calling Cisco customer service.  My name is GaganSANJAY49. How may I help you?

Customer:  Yeah, I got a 211 error when I try to connect to my wireless router.

Operator:  OK, I can help you with that.  What is the problem?

Customer:  I have 211 error when I try to connect to the Internet using your wireless router?

Operator:  A 2 what?

Customer: 211.

Operator:  Okay.  So, you cannot connect to the Internet at all, right?

 Customer:  Yes.

Operator:  Then how is that you are using this chat room?

Customer: (typing) As I just wrote earlier, the computer using the wireless router cannot login onto the Internet.  I am using another computer connected directly to the cable modem.

Operator:  Oh, I see.  So your computer is connected to the Linksys router, correct?

Customer:  Yes.

Operator:  All right, tell me something:  how many Ethernet ports does your modem have?

Customer: One.

Operator: One?

Customer: Yes, One.

Operator:  If you only have one port than how is it that you are able to use the router at all?

Customer: (squeezing the space between his nose) Look, maybe we are getting modems confused.  Let me explain this again.  I have a regular modem from Comcast and a wireless router.  I connect the main modem to the wireless router.  Then the wireless router sends a signal to the other computer.  I don’t have any trouble connecting to the Internet using the main modem.  It’s the computer in the other room that’s giving me trouble.

Operator: (typing) So, there are two modems?

Customer: No. I have one main modem and a Linksys router.

Operator: Um, okay.  Can I have the serial number of the router please?  It should be on the back.

Customer:  One minute.

Operator: OK.

Customer: C345GS567.

Operator:  OK.  Give me a minute.

Customer: (Runs to get a sandwich; returns--- the screen is still blank.  Eats his sandwich).  

Operator:  Sir, fortunately, this product is out of warranty.  I cannot use the chat function to answer your question; however, there a number of terrific options for you.  (1) You can use the FAQ forum or you can call our superb, 24-hour, seven-days a week hotline to answer your question.

Customer: Just give me the phone number.

Operator:  866-745-5678.  Thank you for using the chat function.  I hope you have a wonderful day.  Goodbye.  (A message pops up on the screen: GaganSANJAY49 has left the chat room).

Customer:  (typing) Up yours, thanks for nothing.  (Closes chat window; pulls out cell phone.  Now dialogue is heard).  Let’s see who can screw up my IT now?  (He dials the phone number).

Recording: (cheerful female voice) Thank you for calling Cisco Technical Support.  We appreciate your call.  Our award-winning representatives will be with you shortly.  For quality purposes, your call may be recorded.  (Phone rings, an operator with a heavy Indian accent answers)

Representative:  Hullo, this is *fkan#!dksskngmmhh.  How may I help you?

Customer:  Uh, hello.  I am using a wireless router on another computer.  And, all of the sudden, I have a 211 error and cannot login onto the Internet.

Representative:  Ah, I can *dkdg=sjjkdlsLns that for you.

Customer: Uh, come again.

Representative: Hikkosnki*haqe.  Name?  (The customer provides his name) All right, sir.  Can I have the model number of your unit?

Customer:  It’s expired.

Representative: Expired?

Customer: It’s out of warranty.

Representative: Ah, I see.  Well, sir we have a number of terrific options for you.

Customer:   I’m sure you do.

Representative: First, I can help you for a one-time fee of $29.99.  But an even better option I can recommend for you is to buy a new router.

Customer:  How is buying a new router a better option?

Representative:  It’s covered under warranty, and the tech .support is completely free.

Customer:  Don’t I have to buy the warranty?

Representative: Yes, for a small fee.

Customer: How much would a new router cost me without the small warranty fee?

Representative:  Well, sir, let me first tell you about the amazing new router.  Right now, you are using N-force technology; the current line uses G-force.  You get a much faster connection to the Internet and…

Customer: (annoyed; interrupting) Yeah, yeah, yeah.  It’s a new router.  Obviously it’s going to be better. How much is it going to cost me?

Representative: (taken aback) Uh, it’s $54.99.

Customer: So, I have to shell out $60.00 and a small fee so you can provide me help for three months.

Representative:  Well, it’s $54.99.

Customer: Plus shipping.

Representative: Plus seven dollars, shipping and handling.

Customer:  So, it’s sixty-one dollars.

Representative:  Yes, but, when you buy the router, you are covered.  If something goes wrong, within three months, I can help you—free of charge.

Customer:  If I wanted to do that, I’d just buy one at the store.  It’s the same price without the shipping.

Representative: No, it’s not.

Customer: (irritated) I was just there. $54.99.

Representative: Oh, so you were, and you checked the price, huh?

Customer: Yes, I was just there.

Representative:  Well, I tell you what, sir.  I have a refurbished modem for just $29.99.  It has the G-force and all of the same warranty.

Customer:  I don’t want a new router.  There’s nothing wrong with the one I already have.  Why can’t just help me.  Give a me a little clue or something?

Representative:  Sir, sir.  I am only trying to help you out.  I want you to be satisfied.  I am trying to save you time and money.  You said 214-error, well, I know exactly what that is.

Customer: It’s 211.

Representative:  I know how to fix that too.  But it will cost you $29.99.  For that price, I can give you a refurbished router with a warranty. But, you’re the boss (sorrowful).

Customer: I’m the boss?

Representative: (sorrowful) Yes, sir.

Customer:  Well, the boss says, ‘Goodbye.’’’  (Turns off his cell-phone).

For this blog, think about how you could have made this transaction smoother.  Miscommunication is a common problem when buying computer-related equipment.  Would you bend the rules to help this customer, or would you stick to company policy and try to get him for another router? This blog will be worth double points.  It will be due on Friday evening before 12am.  Good luck.

Y’all Got any Gators?

I done there noticed ya got some gator trouble.  Them there gators are notorious for crashing weddin’s.  I see a big one got some of your there domestics too.  Well, Mr. Granger, I got the just the stuff to prevent any future gator attacks.  Ya see, if it’s one thing I know, it’s gators, and gators is one of the stupidest critters Gwad gave two eyes to.  I do declare that a fence post has got more sense.  Why dem environmentalists get all huffy about protecting them is beyond me.  All it takes is for a gator to bite ‘em in the rear, and they’d change their minds.  Personally,  I take every last one and turn ‘em into a suitcase or a pair boots.

Now ‘bout your problem, Mr. Granger, I tell you how we’d start:  Ya see, I got me a supply of homemade hand grenades that double as depth charges.  You’d be surprised at the size of the endangered stuff I’ve floated  with these babies.  (Makes a great swoosh sound in the water when they explode too).  Anyway, I digress.  We’d probably try to go around the perimeter of your place and drop a few in the nearby canal. Those gators hate the noise the bombs make.  I never seen me a gator swim so fast when those bombs go off.   If we can’t blow them gators up, then we just blast them into that great swamp in the sky.  I got me a nice .50 caliber Desert Eagle for gator blasting.  My oh my,  I could write a book about the things I’ve picked off with that baby.  Pa-Pow!

As it turns out, Mr. Granger, we’re having a blue ribbon special on my website.  You supply the Pabs Blue Ribbon and I’ll knock off a hundred buck from the total price.  I look forward to killing this gator for ya.  Check out my website for further details.  When you tell a friend, remember our motto:  “Whether it flies, crawls or swims, we can kill it.”

Yours truly,

Billy Bayou ,

Head Species Exterminator

Mr. Granger has gone to Billy’s website and was confused by the amount of items on the screen.  Help Billy make a better website.  Take into consideration the items we discussed in Chapter 14.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WOISHc5TEYY

Date: September 18, 2010

To:   Mr. Shush, The Cleaning Dept.

From: Venton Hughes, CEO

Subject:  Hanna Simpson

Hanna Simpson has caused a stir in these offices the last few weeks.  She seems unhappy about our new RFID policy.  Normally, this would not be a problem; however, she has threatened to turn this policy into a media event.  Our shareholders are very nervous.  Because of their goodwill, this company received billions for this RFID policy. I have assured them that this project can maximize profits and productivity.  However, Ms. Simpson’s misunderstood ideas about RFID could hurt our public image, and, worse, prevent us from repaying our debts.

I attempted to assuage Simpson’s fears, but she stormed out of my office a few minutes ago.  Since we allow an open email policy, I checked her emails, and found out her real intentions.  She intends on blackmailing the company over this.  Unfortunately, a decent raise and executive benefits failed to pique Ms. Simpson’s interest.  As a matter of fact, I read that her little performance in my office was just that—an act.

For this reason, I call on you, Mr. Shush. You helped me forego the financial strains of my second divorce. (Brenda looked so peaceful when you finished; she was a feisty woman, but not so in the end).  And for the above reason, I ask you again for the same favor.  One of your  massive heart attacks should do nicely.

The usual amount has been transferred to your overseas account. I require immediate action.  Ms. Simpson has become a cancer on our potential, and like all malignant growths, she must be removed.  I regret having to do this for a second time.  But when you reach my age, you become very protective of your creature comforts.  To paraphrase Kenneth Lay, “You cannot turn a certain lifestyle off like a spigot.”  And I have grown accustomed to mine.

This prompt involves many ethical questions.  For this prompt, I ask you take one of the four roles: Mr. Shush, Hanna’s platonic friend, Jack, a janitorial person who finds this shredded memo in the trash, or Shelia, Hanna’s best friend who knows all about her real plans.  You can choose from two scenarios: (1) Venton carried out his plans and Hanna suffered a heart attack; (2) Venton’s plans were foiled and Hanna lives.  In your fictitious responses, you may adhere or topple the ethical considerations we have covered.  I will be seriously checking your blog responses for this one.  I will be very interested in seeing our responses.  Good luck!

It's Early in the Morning and I can't Think.

It's Early in the Morning and I can't Think.

Tim Watkins, The Employee Who Knew Too Much.

Danica@pharmocom.cso
Dear Danica,

Yo, my baby! My main squeeze! How’s it goin’ at work today? Well, you know what I always say, “The same old grind here, ya know?” I’m working from nine to five, writing all these dumb documents about this new bio-genetic experiment da company’s comin’ out with. I never thought we’d be movin’ into genetics since we’re a pharmaceutical company. But, hey, it’s new and exciting, right? You have any clue what they’re doing down in the company basement? Now, hold on, lemme tell you, ‘cuz I know you don’t sneak around like I do—he-he.( I’m such a spy! And this is huge!)

Sorry, babe, I have to move on to a new paragraph cuz this is just too much. I snuck into Pat’s office a few days ago—you know, our boss, who looks like Shrek—and I just happened to see a printed memo on his desk . Now, babe, when I said this was huge, I really meant it. Evidently, the egg-heads have found some sort of dimensional rift down in the basement. Actually, it’s been there for years, but it’s not until recently that something came through that rift, something unworldly, for lack of a better description. Well, the ol’ bald, bearded ogre has gotten the attention of Uncle Sam. I’m sure you noticed that there have been some soldiers moving in and out of here lately. And, turtle-toes, check this out: I was looking at the elevator panel, ya know, the part of the elevator that has all the buttons on it. Well, the button for the basement is gone. As a matter of fact, the panel is completely new. (Scary, huh? Don’t worry, you’ll be safe in my arms tonight, lamb chop.)

Anyways, I read in the memo that the basement levels can only be accessed by pushing the floor buttons in a certain sequence---6-6-6 to be exact. It’s fitting, cuz, according to the memo, the name of the project is Lucifer Alpha. This is so huge that I nearly spilt my coffee all over my crotch. They got something big, and nasty down there, and big daddy don’t want anyone to see it.

So, I was kind of wondering if you’d like to take a basement tour with me. Don’t worry, don’t worry. I got a way to sneak past the security post. I hacked into the company network and gave myself top clearance. That’s right, honey chow, they’re two big daddy’s running this big pill dispenser now. What if they see us you ask? Well, you know how cheap that shaved ape is. Around four am, the security computer is programmed to shut off. Why? Well, that fancy schmancy system sucks up a lot of juice, and big daddy doesn’t want to pay for twenty-four hour surveillance. The cameras all turn off at that time. So, we can sneak in and nobody will see that it is us. “What about the soldiers, you ask?” Well, babe, stick with me, and you’ll go places. One of the soldiers happens to be an old high school buddy of mine. We played football together. I saw him the coming out of the elevator the other day. Poor guy, had that, I’m following orders look on his face, when he came out. I said, “Hey, Teddy” (his name’s Theodore, but we always called him Teddy). We talked and I told him what I knew and he told what he knew. He didn’t know much because, in the basement, there’s a door that requires top access to get in, and he’s never been beyond that point. Well, guess who’s on guard duty tonight. That’s right good ol’ spiral throwing Teddy. And he agreed to risk getting a court-martial to see what was behind that door.
So, snookie, ya wanna be my date tonight?

Your half-n-half,

Tim Watkins

Team,
Suppose you were Tim’s supervisor and you saw this email he had written to Danica. First, explain what email blunders Tim has committed. What might be some of the risks of writing such a lengthy email? Think about the legal problems and net etiquette. After you have answered those two questions, decide what Tim’s fate would be? Possible scenarios: Does he get dragged to some deserted place and get shot by the US Military? Does his boss take legal action? Or….? (Due next Wednesday, September 8).